100th Blog Post – Three Years of Just a Little Sweat

Today is a very special day for Just a Little Sweat as I am celebrating two major milestones in the life of this blog. It has been exactly 3 years since I wrote my first post for Just a Little Sweat. Today, I share my 100th!!

3 years of Just a Little Sweat

As I sit here at my desk, writing this entry with the help of my favorite yellow towel and fan, I wanted to first say how thankful I am for all of your support in Just a Little Sweat. If you take a look back at my first post on December 5, 2011, I write about not being sure if I wanted to make this blog public. Talking about HH is really scary, even if it’s over the internet! However, you all accepted me and this blog with open arms and have provided as much support to me as this blog may have supported you. Over the course of 3 years writing for Just a Little Sweat, I have met countless people in cyber space – people from all over the globe and all walks of life. I am honored to have met you, to have learned your stories, and to have had the opportunity to respond to your all your comments and emails. Thank you for your positive feedback, your strength and optimism in the HH community, and for lending an open ear to my stories.

A lot has happened in my life in the 3 years since starting this blog. Let’s take a look back at some of my posts as I remember the highlights:

To celebrate 3 years, I looked back at my 100 posts and chose my top 5. I hope you enjoy them as much as I do!

Caryn’s Top 5 Favorite Posts from Just a Little Sweat

5. The HH Super Villain??
I love it when HH appears in pop culture. It’s not proven that the character has HH, but I’m pretty sure he does 🙂 I’m cheating by linking this additional post, but I can’t resist. Check out another HH reference in pop culture in a Luann Comic.

4. What HH has taught me
Every now and then, I return to this post to remind myself of everything I’ve gained because of HH – patience, strength, courage, tolerance and pride in myself.

3. I posted my Blog Site on Facebook
Writing this entry and actually following through with posting it on Facebook was a huge step in my life. I’m proud of how I brave I was in this moment and still think my letter to the Facebook community provides a great introduction to awareness of HH.

2. Sweat and Chicken Wings
This post was a response to a question about my dating life with HH and how coincidentally, my fiance has secondary HH when he eats spicy food like chicken wings. I write: “HH is a big part of your life and a big part of who you are, whether you like it or not. The right person for you is going to love you for everything you are.”

1. How My Blog Got Its Title
I just posted this entry this week, but it is my favorite. I remembered my initial goals for this blog were to help connect the HH community and explain HH in a way that was relatable to people with and without HH. Advocating universal awareness of HH has always been important to me. Thank you for giving me courage to advocate for our community and for being advocates yourself!

Although the time seemed to fly by, so much has changed and I am very happy to be where I am now in life. I’m looking forward to many more years of sharing my stories with you and listening to yours! Thank you again for your support and as always, for reading!

All my best and Happy Holidays,

Caryn

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How My Blog Got Its Title

I started this blog three years ago with the intention of it becoming a platform to connect the HH community and a place to explain our condition in a way that was relatable to everyone – people with and without HH. To be honest, this blog started as an outlet for my growing frustrations with HH. Three years ago, I was struggling because my Robinol tablets had stopped working and I was living in very warm conditions during the summer in NYC. I was upset that there was little to no awareness for our condition and frustrated by the fact that I felt like I couldn’t talk about it because sweat is pretty much a taboo subject in our society. I didn’t think it was fair that people living with HH couldn’t feel comfortable talking openly about their condition and I felt as if we were forced to live in silent suffering. HH is a medical condition. Whether you were born with it or developed it later on in life, HH is nothing you did wrong and it’s not something you could control.

Three years ago when I was thinking of potential names and goals for this blog, I was really hitting a road block. It was not until I heard people out there say, “It’s just a little sweat, how bad can it be?”

There it was. As someone living with HH, I never wanted to hear that.

I decided that I could start a blog to explain HH in a way that showed all aspects of the impact HH has made on my life – physically, mentally, emotionally, and socially. Three years ago, there were a few medical blogs and websites about HH, but I felt the HH community (and the rest of the world!) was lacking a personal account of the everyday experiences, feelings, and encounters of someone living with this condition. I wanted to raise awareness and support for all the challenges we face and all the obstacles we overcome.

So, this is how my blog came about and it’s exactly how it got its title, Just a Little Sweat. Once you read some of the posts, dig a little deeper and spend a day in our shoes, you’ll find out that it’s anything but.

Lessons for my high school self

I’ve had HH for almost 28 years now and I think I’ve learned a thing
or two. If I were to travel to the past and meet up with my high
school self, I would share what I have learned.

I approach my high school self. I am in the band room, my second home.
I know that at this point in my life I was slowly starting to tell my
closest friends and teachers about HH. I had a love for playing the
flute, but struggled with my hot, sweaty hands. I also had
difficulties in school, taking tests and writing essays with paper and
pen.

“You inspire me because you are brave. You have talked about HH openly
with your closest friends. You give me hope that people are accepting
and understanding. I hope that you continue to share your stories
about HH with those closest to you.”

I know that once I hit college, I started hiding my HH again. I barely
told anyone about it until my junior or senior year. I can only
think of 5 people I told in college- none were teachers. I think
telling people about it and talking openly, even with a few people, is
so helpful and a real coping mechanism.

“People aren’t paying attention to you and your HH as much as you
think. You may feel that your sweat is obvious and feel anxious about
it, but chances are other people really have no idea and can’t tell.”

People with HH are amazing at hiding it even though it might not feel
like it. I went through college and grad school without any teachers
knowing I had it. I just took a deep breath and did what needed to be done.
Easier said than done, but I’ve learned to at least try to stop worrying about
what people think.

“Don’t give up and follow your passions.”

I didn’t let HH hold me back. I found ways to modify the activities I
loved or talked to someone about it for advice. I have played the flute
for 19 years. All I needed was a fan, a hugely absorbent towel, great
musician friends, and sometimes a tub of cold water to stand in.
I’ve learned to make do with what I have.

“Although it might sound cliche, I promise that it does get better.”

Since graduating high school, I’ve had 10 more years of experience with
HH. I’ve learned different coping techniques, tried new treatments, and
helped the HH community grow. I know there is help and support out there
and have seen it first hand.

I am proud of my journey with HH and am happy that I have learned with it
and from it. I know that I can’t really share what I have learned with my high
school self, but I can share it with you.

How would life be different without HH?

Sometimes I wonder how my life would be different without Hyperhidrosis.

I wouldn’t have to worry about the little things like greeting someone new with a handshake or writing with a pen on paper. I wouldn’t have to worry about holding a newspaper, either deteriorating the paper with sweat or coming away with print on my hands. I wouldn’t have to worry about holding onto a subway rail, taking change back from a cashier, accidentally touching someone’s arm with a cold and wet hand, or leaving an embarrassing hand print behind. I wouldn’t have grown up with other kids not wanting to hold my hand during square dancing in gym class or as their line partner to go to the lunch room. I wouldn’t have had to avoid certain things growing up like playing clapping games with my friends or braiding each others’ hair.

Sometimes I think about life without HH and how normal it would have been. I wouldn’t have had to be anxious about my underarm sweat stains reaching the hem of my shirt, or going to the nurse’s office several times a week just to avoid my embarrassment. Maybe I would have continued taking gymnastics lessons. Maybe I would have joined clogging dance with my sister where there is a lot of hand holding.

Life without HH seems so normal and it’s something I’ve envied for a long time. But thinking of life without HH sure has a lot of maybe’s and  what if’s.

What I do know is that I really can’t imagine my life without HH. It is a part of me and it is a part of who I have become. Without HH, I would have taken all of the above for granted. I feel fortunate that I don’t.

HH has made me a stronger person. It has given me pride in accomplishing even the smallest of tasks. HH has also made me an observer and someone who cares a lot. It has given me an understanding and appreciation for all people.

So how would life be different without HH? I’m not quite sure.
But I think life with HH has made it better.

 

How to Buy a Ring for a Girl with HH

It’s hard to believe that two years ago, I wrote a blog post about HH and Engagement Rings and now, I have my own engagement ring! I had some fears about it before, but between successful Iontophoresis treatments and my excitement about the engagement, my anxieties have gone away.

My fiance, Francis, put so much thought and effort into the proposal and I couldn’t be happier with how things turned out! He has always been incredibly supportive and understanding of my HH. For the proposal, he took my HH into consideration and came up with ways to make sure everything would be perfect, including the ring. I am so lucky to have him in my life and I hope you enjoy this beautiful guest post he has written.
_______________________

Hyperhidrosis was never an issue in the first place. In fact, I was supposed to be all set. I apologize that the title might be a little misleading since this is really a story about how I made this more complicated than it needed to be.

A year or so before I asked her parents’ blessings, Caryn had actually e-mailed them information on all the rings she liked. So when I worked up the courage to ask for her parents’ blessings earlier this May, I was given everything I could’ve ever needed for the ring, ranging from the styles and cuts to the actual ring size. I had some vague ideas on how I would propose which included taking her to a daffodil garden in Atlanta (she’s in love with daffodils) or proposing to her on an ice rink during winter (which is how I asked her to be my girlfriend). My ideas were decent, but not only would she have seen those proposals coming, the ideas depended entirely on seasons, which would’ve made me wait for this winter or next spring.

It was only until I was about to leave her parents’ house that  I came up with the idea of proposing at the finish line of a half marathon. It was brilliant! We’ve run one half marathon every year for the last three years and all the dedication and hard work has meant a lot to both of us. She would never see this coming.

“I thought you gave up on half marathons last year?” she asked.

Okay, I did tell her that half marathons were too long and painful, but I could look past it just this once. I am proposing after all.

“Yeaaaah, I changed my mind, I like half marathons!”

A couple of days later, we officially signed up for the Grete’s Great Gallop Half Marathon in Central Park at October 5th! While she was busy creating a training guide, I was busy figuring out all the logistics behind the proposal.

“Are you going to run with the ring?” one friend asked.

“Don’t you think you’re going to be out of breath?” another friend inquired.

These were important details that I knew I would have to figure out, but when I told her mom about the idea, she revealed the biggest curveball of them all:

“What about her hyperhidrosis?”

As much as I initially wanted to deny that this would be an issue, this really doesn’t bode well for the ring. Her mom provided me with her ring size 9. This is what Caryn uses to give herself enough room when her hand swells up. I would be forcing her to sweat and swell up her hands if we run this race. This wouldn’t be an issue in a normal situation, but would she have issues putting the ring on after running 13.1 miles?

Could I propose to her before the race? I thought about it briefly, but found it to be awfully anticlimactic, so I knew it wouldn’t be a real option. I was so excited about the idea initially but the more I thought about it, the riskier it became. Her mom assured me that Caryn would like the proposal no matter what but I certainly didn’t want to disappoint her. I wanted to make sure I did things right.

Amidst of all of this, my friends kept bugging me that the ring size seemed off, which made me doubt it was correct. This was frustrating because I didn’t know how Caryn would feel if I told them about her HH and I just didn’t know if they’d understand. I knew nothing about ring sizes to begin with, but once I got clarification about the size, I assured them that the size was correct and it’s because Caryn’s hands have a tendency to swell up.

I realized that there were other options outside proposing at the beginning or the end of the race. I could propose to her in the middle of the race instead. This way, her hand would be less sweaty. The risk involved with the ring fitting on her hand was still there, but I felt better about her hands in the middle of the race.

I also played around the idea of proposing at the hot air balloon festival near her parents house. This would be an alternative plan and even though it sounds romantic, I felt that hot air balloons are nowhere near as significant to us compared to the half marathon. Luckily, I didn’t have to propose that way…

We were riding the subway one day when Caryn started getting anxious about the upcoming gig we were traveling to. Although she’s been doing the Iontophoresis treatment, her hands started sweating more as we got closer to the venue. She started complaining that her hands were getting sweaty because she was nervous and all of a sudden, I found myself just blatantly asking her point blank.

“When your hands start sweating, does your ring ever feel tight on you?”

“Well, size 9 is big enough for my finger so it’s okay. I don’t really have issues putting the ring on but it’s a little tight when I remove it.”

The ring would actually fit! Finally, a wave of anxiety lifted off my head and all I had to do was just bluntly ask her! I didn’t want to raise suspicions, but in my head, I thought I was so cool and smooth by sneaking it into the conversation. She saw right through it though, but fortunately, she didn’t really let my question get into her head.

It wasn’t exactly smooth sailing afterwards. The week before the race, my entire plan almost crashed and burned in front of me when Caryn accidentally tripped on a staircase and fell on her ankle. Thankfully she was okay and my mini heart attack subsided, but it really put things into perspective. This was my plan from the start and this is how I planned to propose to her. Proposing alone is frightening enough as it is, but running a half marathon on top of that was the hardest thing I’ve ever done physically and mentally. And all of it could fail at a drop of a hat. It wasn’t just the Hyperhidrosis. One of us could get injured, the race could get washed out or she could plainly just have said no.

But despite all those risks came the big payoff. The weather was beautiful and we had an amazing group of friends who were waiting for us in the 5 mile mark with their hand-written signs that said “Caryn, Francis Has A Question For You.” Caryn complained that my pace was too fast from the start of the race, but my nerves and adrenaline were pushing me to get to that proposal spot. A few streets before we got to our friends, Caryn commented that we were almost half way through the race and I smiled knowing that I was about to change her life forever in the next couple of feet.

The next three minutes were such a blur. The important things are that she said yes and the ring fit her finger. As much as I tried to envision how the proposal would go, there were details I could’ve never prepared for including the empty cups littered all over the ground from the water station. But the little things like that are what made it memorable.

Could I have gotten away with doing something safer and avoided all this trouble? Maybe propose to her at an ice rink akin to how I asked her out? Her hands wouldn’t have been an issue and Caryn would’ve loved it all the same. But when you’re after someone who means the world to you, that risk is worth it. You just need to have the courage to take that leap of faith in the first place.

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Topical Treatments for HH

I have had great success with the antiperspirant, CertainDri. It stopped my underarm excessive sweating and I highly recommend this product to anyone.

Although I was always curious if CertainDri would work if I put it on my hands, I never tried it because it said it was only for underarms.

Well, last month when I was struggling with palmar sweating again after my Iontophoresis treatments lost some strength, I was desperate. For two nights in a row, I rolled CertainDri on my palms, put some plastic wrap over my hands, covered my hands with socks, and then slept with them like that all night.

I remember my skin becoming irritated when I used CertainDri on my underarms many years ago, but I was happily surprised to have no discomfort on my hands. However, after just two nights of this treatment, the skin from my hands became extremely dry looking and flaky. I was happy with the results for the most part, but I wouldn’t use CertainDri on my hands continuously because of the flaky look. It took about 2 weeks for my hands to look normal again. Has anyone else tried Certain Dri on their hands/feet or any other part of their body other than underarms?

Here are some other topical treatments I have been suggesting:

Will my kids have HH?

I’m often asked if I’m worried about passing Hyperhidrosis on to my kids. HH runs in my family, so I know that there is a pretty good chance of passing it on.

I’ve given this a lot of thought for many years. In the past, I was concerned about passing it on because I know the difficulties of HH first hand and I don’t want my children to suffer through it. Children especially have trouble with HH in school and social activities. Years ago, a part of me thought my future children would be angry with me for passing it on.

However, after more thought and discussion with family members, I can say that although there is a high chance of passing HH on to my kids, it doesn’t deter me from wanting to have my own children. I have always wanted to be a mom.

In fact, if my children are born with HH, I will be incredibly well-equipped and be their biggest support. I will be able to share coping techniques and be knowledgeable about treatments. I will be a huge resource and am confident I will be able to help them.