From the Other Side

This is not “Part 2” of my previous entry.

One of the reasons I titled my previous entry, “Have I avoided this enough yet?” is because it’s so hard to talk and write about. It’s even hard to think about. I’ve gone back and forth for months on the subject, finally making at the very least, a temporary decision. It’s an exhausting topic and so I will be avoiding it some more, until part 2.

Today, however, I wanted to briefly discuss something that I find interesting.

This is probably going to make me sound like a hypocrite and I hope I don’t upset you.

My hands aren’t sweating 100% of the time. There are plenty of times when I’m totally “normal”.

During these times, if I encounter the sweaty palms of someone else, I find it…unpleasant.

That is the term I have decided to use. I don’t think it’s “bad” or “gross”. I don’t judge these people, I just notice that it is “unpleasant”. A sweaty handrail on the subway…a wet shopping bag handed to me by a cashier.

Believe me when I say that this upsets me. I of all people, sufferer of HH, should understand a thing or two about sweat. And you know from my previous posts that those two exact situations have happened to me! So why do I react this way? I guess I’m seeing it from the other side.

Also what is interesting, is that I had a similar reaction to just water. I went to hold my boyfriend’s hand and it was wet from the condensation from a drink or something. My reaction was the exact same…I knew it wasn’t sweat, but it was wet, and I didn’t like it.

So, okay, that makes me feel a little better. It’s not really the sweat that bothers me.

Still. Why?

It makes me feel kind of defeated actually. That no matter how much awareness and acceptance there is of HH, it’s still “unpleasant”.

Thoughts?

Caryn Joan

3 thoughts on “From the Other Side

  1. I have been on both sides of the coin before with HH. I think since I had such a negative experience when I was younger when I am faced with the situation that I am the person on the other side I try to be supportive. For example I had a situation where I was riding the bus and a gentlemen who clearly had the underarm stains forming in his shirt could not get anyone to move over for a seat. I decided this was ridiculous (come on people give the man a seat already). I let him sit next to me and for majority of the ride we had a conversation about video games and he relaxed. I felt eye rolls and pity looks of the other looky loos. I hope that guy had a little bit better of a day in the end.

  2. It is just because it’s wet. No matter what from. It’s just something like a physical rule – warm and dry feels nice, wet and cold not. When I have a dry moment a sense of wellbeing is immediately spreading through my whole body, the difference is amazing. And makes me think wow, that is what people with normal hands and feet feel like all the time, and they haven’t got a clue how lucky they are…and nobody (other than the wonderful people i have met online, like yourself) has a clue just how much I wish I didn’t have to spend so much of my life in a physically uncomfortable state. On a hot day I will look at people’s dry non-swollen feet in sandals with mine exploding in my sneakers and me constantly checking whether the sweat has made it thru the shoes yet…and i feel so sad. But that’s why you can’t judge yourself for not liking a wet touch when you are dry, it is the same reason as why we don’t feel comfortable, and are justified in calling us HH “sufferers”. Love, Ivonne

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